KURMA - BUAH PALING AGUNG.

Kurma kepada Rasullullah SAW
Keutamaan buah kurma juga di nyatakan dalam sunah Nabi SAW sebagai berikut. Nabi berkata kepada
Aisyah,"Wahai Aisyah, rumah yang tiada kurma di dalam-nya adalah kelaparan kepada penghuni-nya."
Dari Anas RA berkata,"Bahawa Rasullullah SAW sarapan pagi dengan kurma, sebelom baginda sholat.
Jika tidak dgn kurma masak, maka baginda akan makan kurma mentah. Jika tidak dengan kurma mentah, maka Nabi sarapan dengan air kurma."
Ibnu Al-Qayyim dalam bukunya Zad Al-Ma'ad menyatakan bahawa kurma masak berguna untuk memperkuatkan perut yang dingin dan menyegarkan badan. Buah kurma adalah ketua segala buah dan merupakan buah yang paling agung.
Ia menguatkan ginjal dan menghaluskan pencernaan. Mengambil sewaktu sarapan pagi akan membunuh ulat di dalam badan. Kurma adalah makanan bergizi, minuman, manis-manisan. Sangat sesuai di nikmati semasa bulan Ramadhan.

Manfaat Kurma.
Kurma masak dapat menenangkan urat saraf, menghilangkan ketegangan, kegelisahan, menekan luka pada perut,
berguna untuk hati, penyakit kuning, kulit kering, bibir pecah. Mengandungi kandungan fostorus yang membantu menguatkan
tulang dan gigi. Berguna kepada penderita batuk, kahak lendir, radang saluran udara, membersihkan paru-paru dan kulit.
Pohon kurma merupakan tanaman yg tertua yg dikenali dalam sejarah manusia. Pohon kurma memilikki sejarah yang unik dan kuno.

* Membantu pesedian dan menguatkan otot semasa melahirkan.
* Sumber tenaga kerana mempunyai gula yang tinggi.
* Menyembunkan penyakit kabur penglihatan pada malam hari kerana mengandungi vitamin A.
* Membantu menenangkan kegelisahan.
* Membantu merangsangkan nafsu makan.
*Berguna untuk pengubatan anemia kerana mengandungi zat besi yang tinggi.

Manfaat Kurma Yang Lain ialah.

* Tidak membawa bakteria dan kuman.
* Biji - biji serbuk kurma menyembuhkan kemandulan wanita.
* Mengambil 7 biji kurma sehari akan mengelakkan diri dari di hampiri jin.
* Air kurma yang di masak dan di minum akan membebaskan dari kesedihan hati.
* Kurma sangat kaya dengan kalori. Maka sebiji kurma cukup untuk menjaga daya tahan untuk bekerja
dalam sehari.
* Mengubati kekurangan darah kerana mengandungi unsur besi dan dan protein ringan, memudahkan pencernaan
dan mengandungi vitamin A, B dan C.
* Memiliki antibodi untuk mencegah radang.
* Menajamkan mata terutama di waktu malam.
* Kurma juga meringankan tekanan darah sewaktu hamil.
* Melikki kesan yang baik untuk membinasakan sisa - sisa racun yang di akibatkan oleh asimilasi ( proses pencernaan
makanan ) di dalam tubuh.

"Kurma menguatkan hati, memperhaluskan pencernaan, menambahkan kekuatan berjimak ( stamina )
khususnya jika di campur dengan biji pohon cemara. Buah kurma sangat bergizi untuk tubuh dan mengambilnya sebelum sarapan
dapat membunuh kuman atau ulat dan kurma adalah buah, makanan gizi, minuman dan makanan ringan," ( Ibnu Al-Qayyim )

Read only if you have time for ALLAH

إقرأه فقط إن كنت تمتلك وقتا لـ الله
Let me tell you, make sure you read all the way to the bottom.. I almost deleted this email but I was blessed when I got to the end

دعني أخبرك، تأكد انك ستقراه الى النهاية لقد كدت احذفه ولكني بوركت عندما انهيته

ALLAH, when I received this e-mail, I thought...
الله'وهو عنوان الرساله' عندما وصلتني هذه الرساله, فكرت....

I don't have time for this... And, this is really inappropriate during work

ليس لدي وقت لقراءة تلك الأشياء كما أنني بوقت غير مناسب للقراءة ..فأنا في العمل

Then, I realized that this kind of thinking is... Exactly, what has caused lot of the problems in our world today.

وبعدها لاحظت بأن هذا النوع من التفكير هو تماما السبب الذي يجعل عالمنا مليئ بالمشاكل في الوقت الحالي

We try to keep ALLAH in MASJIDS on FRIDAY...

نحن نحاول أن نجعل الله والدين بالمساجد ايام الجمعة

Maybe, FRIDAY night...

وربما بليل الجمعة

And, the unlikely event of a MAGHRIB SALLAH.

وصلاة المغرب احيانا

We do like to have Him around during sickness...

نحن نحب ان نذكره ايام المرض

And, of course, at funerals

.وطبعا الجنائز

However, we don't have time, or room, for Him during work or play...

لكن ليس لدينا الوقت ولا المساحة لأن نذكره خلال العمل او اللعب

Because.. That's the part of our lives we think.... We can, and should, handle on our own.

لأن هذا هو الوقت الذي نعتقد فيه بأننا قادرين على أن نعتمد على أنفسنا فيه

May ALLAH forgive me for ever thinking...

ياالله سامحني على هذا النوع من التفكير

That... there is a time or place where..

HE is not to be FIRST in my life.

التفكير الذي يقول أن هناك وقت او مكان لا يكون 'الله' الأول والأهم في حياتي

We should always have time to remember all HE has done for us.

يجب أن يكون لدينا الوقت 'لأن نذكر كل ما قدمه 'الله لنا

Pass this on ONLY IF YOU MEAN IT!!

أنشرها فقط إن كنت مقتنع بها

Yes, I do Love ALLAH.

نعم، انا أحب الله
HE is my source of existence and Savior.

هو مصدر وجودي ومنقذي

He keeps me functioning each and every day. Without Him, I will be nothing.
وهو الذي يبقينا أحياء كل يوم ومن دونه سنصبح لا شيء

This is the simplest test.

هذا أسهل اختبار ممكن
If You Love ALLAH... And, are not ashamed of all the marvelous things HE has done for you...

اذا كنت تحب الله ولا تخجل من جميع الأشياء الرائعة التي قام بها من أجلك

Send it on...

أنشرها

Now do you have the time to pass it on?

والآن ألديك وقت للنشــر ..؟؟

Make sure that you scroll through to the end.

تأكد إنك ستصل لنهاية الرسالة

Easy vs. Hard

السهــــل ×الصعـــــــــب

Why is it so hard to tell the truth but Yet so easy to tell a lie?

لماذا يكون من الصعب جدا أن تقول الحقيقه ومع ذلك من السهل جدا ان تكذب

Why are we so sleepy in THE MASJID but right when the sermon is over we suddenly wake up?

لماذا نشعر بالنعاس وقت الصلاة و في المسجد وبمجرد أن تنتهي الخطبه نصحو فجأة


Why is it so easy to delete a HOLY e-mail, but yet we forward all of the nasty ones?

لماذا يكون من السهل جدا أن نحذف ايميل ديني ومع ذلك ننشر كل ما هو سيّء

Of all the free gifts we may receive, Prayer is the very best one....

من ضمن كل الهدايا المجانيه التي نحصل عليها .. دعوة صادقة هي أفضلهم

There are no costs, but wonderful rewards...

لن تكون هناك عقوبات لعدم النشر لكن جائزة رائعة

بإذن الله

Notes: Isn't it funny how simple it is for people to NOT BELIEVE IN ALLAH and then wonder why the world's going to hell.

ملحوظة: شيء مضحك أن هناك أناس لا يؤمنون بالله ويستغربون لماذا العالم ذاهب 'لجهنم'

دلالة على فساد العالم

Isn't it funny how someone can say 'I believe in ALLAH ' but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also 'believes' in ALLAH ).

شيء مضحك أن يأتي شخص ويدعي بأنه مؤمن بالله ولكنه لم يزل يتبع أبليس 'كما أن ابليس يؤمن بالله '

Isn't it funny how you can send a thousand jokes through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding ISLAM , people think twice about sharing?

شيء مضحك أنه من الممكن أن ترسل الآلاف من النكت عن طريق الإيميل وتنتشر مثل النار في الهشيم واذا ارسلت ايميل اسلامي الناس يفكرون مرتين قبل أن يعيدوا نشرها

Isn't it funny how when you go to forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them.

كما أنه من المضحك أنه عندما تقوم بنشر هذا الإيميل لن تقوم بإرساله إلى كل من عندك لإنك غير متأكد بماذا يؤمنون وكيف يفكرون بك اذا ارسلتها لهم

Isn't it funny how I can be more worried about what other people think of me than what ALLAH thinks of me.

من المضحك أن نخاف من رأي الناس فينا اكثر من رأي الله فينا !!

I MAKE DUA, for everyone who sends this to their entire address book, they will be blessed by ALLAH in a way special for them.

انا دعوت لكل شخص يرسل هذا الإيميل لكل من عنده بدفتر العناوين ، أن يبارك لهم ربي بطريقة خاصة لهم

بإذن الله


And send it back to the person who sent it, to let them know that indeed it was sent out to many more

وأرسلها لنفس الشخص إللي أرسلها لك لكي يعلم بأن الرسالة قد نشرت فعلا
الشمعة لا تخسر شيئا اذا ما تم إستخدامها لإشعال شمعة اخرى

Old friends, come and go.
New friends, to and fro.
Me? Still in a dream,
Floating haplessly on a stream.
I feel as if I am not myself,
As if am forgotten on a shelf.
A toy no longer in the trend,
Where famous came to an abrupt end.
Where's my old friends, where they've gone?
Leaving me stranded all alone?
And my new friends, we're not that close,
Arguing faster than a wilting rose.
And here I am, feeling all forlorn,
There's people around me, but I am torn
Between old friends and new friends, who have been with me,
Our promise to be with each other all eternity.
But what has happened between us all?
Where were us-ness when I fall?
Where's the love? Why all the hate?
Were we meant to receive this fate?
To all friends, new and old,
There's a saying I've been told,
A friend in need,
Is a friend indeed.
But I dunno why
As days go by
As night turns to day
The emptiness in me do not go away.
This is the story about my emptiness,
Not about love, or about the darkness,
This emptiness in me is staying forever,
Even with people around me, one after the other.

Base on true story from others..

Alhamdullillah.. I'm an acute migraine sufferer to the extent of vomitting and becoming imbalance. Every time it happens, I have to take antacid & synflex. Antacid is to line the stomach before taking synflex which is a stronger pain killer than panadol. This is to let you know the strength of synflex that so much so I have to take antacid prior to swallowing synflex. This worries me quite a bit as taking pain killers posed other health concerns later. I've tried many times to manage it without swallowing synflex but it got worst. Hence, I'm resigned to probably take synflex for the rest of my life at that time!

Then, one day one of you have so kind heartedly emailed me the ways and hows to cure headache by one Singapore Ustazah (sorry can't remember the name of the sender as well as the Ustazah). The method includes reading this ayat. I've tried it and Alhamdullillah, being a bad migraine sufferer, I'm amazed at the miraculous cure! However, you have to do it repeatedly.

For once in my life, I did not need to take synflex ! You see, strangely about migraine sufferer, we can feel when the attacks are coming and when it starts to ebb away. So, friends, save this method onto your handphone 'Notes' or 'To-do List' so that when you have a headache and with strong conviction, do the method, Insyaallah, it will work !

1. Read Al fateha (1 x )
2. Read Surah Al Ikhlas (3xs )
3. Read Surah Yassin ayat ke 58 ' Salamun Qaulan Minrabbirrahim' (3xs )
4. Read Selawat (3xs )

What I did was, I blew it on my palms and put my palms on my head for a while. After that, I repeat the whole process again. I hope by sharing this experience, we become more
confident of ayat2 Allah. Another sister has shared her experience below. Please read. This ayat is really powerful!

True story : my story . My sister was staying with me some months ago. My sister was bleeding profusely akibat pendarahan dalaman (internal bleeding). Teringatkan Pak Kiai di
Rawang yang sering merawat sister itu, I asked my niece to call and ask him what we should do? He said 'baca ayat 58 dari surah Yassin dan niat sambil meniup kearah duburnya
bagi menghentikan pendarahan tersebut'. So my niece pun buatlah. A few seconds later darah pun berhenti. Oh god, what a miracle, alhamdullilah, leganya.

From that day onwards, itulah yang saya buat apabila ada orang yang perlu bantuan mengh entikan pendarahan. Yakinlah dgn ayat2 Allah.

RAHSIA SURAH YASSIN AYAT KE 58
Barangsiapa yang membaca YAASIN sepenuhnya dan pada ayat ke 58 surah tersebut 'SALAAMUN QAULAN MIN RABBIN RAHIM' diulang sebanyak 7 kali untuk 7 niat baikmu, Insya Allah dengan izin Yang Maha
Esa dan Maha Kuasa, semua hajatmu akan dikabulkan.Jika boleh niatkan sebegini:

1) Y! A-ALLAH YA-RAHIM, ampunkan dosa-dosaku dan saudara-maraku
2) YA-ALLAH YA-RAHMAN, kurniakan aku isteri,suami,anak-anak yang soleh dan mencintai Islam
3) YA-ALLAH YA-RAZZAK, kurniakan aku rezeki yang berkat,kerja yang baik dan berjaya didunia dan akhirat.
4) YA-ALLAH YA-JABBAR, makbulkan hajat pen ghantar maklumat yang aku dapat ini.
5) YA-ALLAH YA-MUTAQABBIR, jauhkan aku dari sifat khianat dan munafiq dan miskin .
6) YA-ALLAH YA-WADUUD, kurniakan aku dan seluruh umat Muhammad yang beriman kesihatan zahir batin.
7) YA-ALLAH YA-ZALJALA LIWAL IKRAM, makbulkanlah semua hajatku, dan redhaikanlah aku..... AMINnnnn.

Sampaikan dakwah ini kepada sahabat anda tiada kerugian bahkan digalakkan. Ikhlaskanlah hatimu menyampaikan dakwah ini kerana Allah. Dunia adalah pentas,
akhirat tempatnya yang sebenarnya.....

Beautiful Hadith
Rasulullah (Sallallahualaihewasallam) said: 'When a man dies and his relatives are busy in funeral, there stands an extremely handsome man by his head. When the dead body is shrouded, that man gets in between the shroud and the chest of the deceased.

When after the burial, the people return home, 2 angels, Munkar and Nakeer(names of two special Angels), come in the grave and try to separate this handsome man so that they may be able to interrogate the dead man in privacy about his faith. But the handsome man says, 'He is my companion, he is my friend. I will not leave him alone in any case. If you are appointed for interrogation, do your job. I cannot leave him until I get him admitted into Paradise '.

Thereafter he turns to his dead companion and says, 'I am the Qur'an, which you used to read, sometimes in a loud voice and sometimes in a low voice. Do not worry. After the interrogation of Munkar and Naker, you will have no grief.'

When the interrogation is over, the handsome man arranges for him from Al-Mala'ul A'laa (the angels in Heaven) silk bedding filled with musk.

Rasulullah (Sallallahu alaihe wasallam) said: 'On the Day of Judgement, before Allah, no other Intercessor will have a greater status than the Qur'an, neither a Prophet nor an angel.'

Please keep forwarding this 'Hadith' to all ...because

Rasulullah (Sallallahu alaihe wasallam) said:
'Pass on knowledge from me even if it is only one verse'.

May Allah bestow this favour on all of us.

AMEEN

Assalamu Alaikum

We are praying that the following message in the next seven days would reach at least FIVE MILLION Muslims all over the world, Insha-Allah. Please forward this message TODAY to your friends and relatives and earn abundant Rewards from Allah Subhanahu watala.

SAYINGS (HADITH) OF PROPHET MUHAMMAD (Sallallaahu alaihi wa sallam)

The one who disdains prayers (Salat) will receive Fifteen punishments from
Allah.
Six punishments in this lifetime
Three while dying
Three in the grave &
Three on the Day of Judgment.

THE SIX PUNISHMENTS OF LIFE :
1. Allah takes away blessings from his age (makes his life misfortunate)
2. Allah does not accept his plea (Dua 's)
3 . Allah erases the features of good people from his face.
4. He will be detested by all creatures on earth.
5. Allah does not reward him for his good deeds. (No thawab)
6. He will not be included in the Dua's of good people.

THE THREE PUNISHMENTS WHILE DYING :
1. He dies humiliated.
2. He dies hungry.
3. He dies thirsty. Even if he drinks the water of all seas he will still be thirsty.

THE THREE PUNISHMENTS IN THE GRAVE :
1. Allah tightens his grave until his chest ribs come over each other.
2. Allah pours on him fire with embers.
3. Allah sets on him a snake called 'the brave', 'the bold' which hits him from morning until afternoon for leaving Fajr prayer, from the afternoon until Asr for leaving Dhuhr prayer and so on. With each strike he sinks 70 yards under the ground.

THE THREE PUNISHMENTS ON THE DAY OF JUDGMENT :
1. Allah sends who would accompany him to hell pulling him on the face.
2. Allah gives him an angry look that makes the flesh of his face fall down.
3. Allah judges him strictly and orders him to be thrown in hell.
Note: If you get this copy, please make copies of it and distribute them among all Muslims. You will be earning a Reward as well as helping to show your brother the Right Path. May Allah give guidance to all of us.
AAMEEN!!!!!! !

------------ --------- --------- --------- -------
THOSE WHO DO NOT SAY THEIR PRAYERS OF:
FAJR : the glow of their face is taken away.
ZUHR : the blessing of their income is taken away.
ASR : the strength of their body is taken away.
MAGHRIB : they are not benefited by their children.
'ISHA : the peace of their sleep is taken away.

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -
THE HOLY QUR'AN:
'Say Your Prayers Before Prayers For You Are Said'.

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, if you
1. Let this e-mail sit in your mailbox or delete it, no curse or whatever may happen to you (Insha-Allah)
2. Forward this e-mail to a number of people you know and by the grace of Allah you shall be blessed for each person you forward this email to.
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, Please do your best!!!
May the infinite mercies and blessings of almighty Allah be upon us (amin)
Insha-Allah ASSALAAMUALAIKUM.....

Dalam suatu perbicaraan di Mahkamah.. Hakim meminta pesalah berdiri untuk diperdengarkan tuduhan.

"Saudara didakwa membunuh seorang guru dengan menggunakan gergaji" kata hakim.

Dari belakang terdengar seseorang berteriak... "Kurang ajar!!!"

"Bawa bertenang. Ini Mahkahmah!" bentak hakim.

Hakim kemudian membacakan lagi tuduhan... "Saudara juga didakwa melakukan pembunuhan terhadap seorang penjual akhbar dengan menggunakan pisau..!"

"Celaka!!!" teriak pengunjung tadi.

"Tenang, Bawa tenang!" teriak hakim dengan keras. "Dan.. saudara juga dituduh melakukan pembunuhan terhadap seorang posmen dengan menggunakan parang..!" kata hakim.

"Keparat!!!" teriak pengunjung tadi tanpa boleh ditahan.

Dengan geram Hakim berkata, "Jika anda tidak boleh berikan alasan kenapa anda berperangai seperti ini.. saya akan perintahkan anda di masukkan ke Hospital Bahagia atas kesalahan menghina mahkahmah!"

"Maaf.. Yang Arif... " pengunjung tadi berkata... "Saya adalah jiran pesalah... sebenarnya setiap kali saya ingin meminjam gergaji, Pisau dan parang... dia selalu cakap... tidak ada!"

Aziz dan Ani membawa anak lelaki mereka yang berusia 6 tahun ke klinik. Walaupun pada mulanya agak malu dan segan, akhirnya mereka membuka mulut juga menceritakan kebimbangan mereka tentang kemaluan anak mereka yang agak kecil berbanding kanak-kanak lain yang sebayanya.

Selepas melakukan pemeriksaan, doktor berkata,

"beri makan telur separuh masak setiap pagi. Lama-lama besarlah tu."

Besok pagi, apabila anak lelaki mereka hendak bersarapan, terkejutlah dia melihat ada 10 biji telur di meja makan.

"Telur ni untuk saya ke mak?", tanya si anak.

"Engkau makan dua biji saja. Yang lain tu untuk ayah
kau punye", kata emaknya.

Ha........Lu Pikir ah sendiri........!

Al kisah bermuler di sebuah kampung, seorang atok tuer sedang asyik membasuh pakaian luar dan dalam nyer di tepi sunggai sambil mendendangkan lagu renjis-renjis dipilis. Tiber-tiber, datang seekor bangau yang tercedere kepaknyer meminum air sungai terbabit.

Kasihankan bangau nyer pasal, orang tuer tu mengambil keputusan tuk merawat luker bangau tu sampai sembuh... ..di pendekkan citer, sembuh la bangau tu dan dier berjanji akan membalas budi orang tuer tu tadi serter menjempot orang tuer tu ke perumahan kos rendah yang didiami beliau.

Maker, orang tuer tu pon pegi la ke rumah tempat penginapan si bangau. lantas si bangau pon mengarah pembantu-pembantunya mengeluarkan duer kotak hadiah. satu kotak kecik, satu lagi kotak besor. si tuer disuruh memilih kotak tersebut dan dier mencapai kotak yang kecil. si bangau lalu berkata:

"Sesungguhnyer ko memang baik hati orang tuer. Ko membantu aku dengan ikhlas dan jujur. sebenornyer, kotak besor tu dah aku isikan dengan sos lader hitam jer.so, terime lar hadiah pemberian ku yang tak seberaper ni"

Kater si bangau merendah diri. Si tuer terus membuker kotak yang di ambilnyer tadi dan terdapat 5 bijik kunci untuk 5 buah keter mercedes benz berlainan kelas.

Alangkah terkejutnyer si bangau biler si tuer menolak hadiah yang sket nyer bernilai tu. Biler di soal oleh si bangau mengaper dier menolak pemberian tu, si tuer menjawab:

"Giler ko! aku dah ler tak der lesen memandu, dah ler aku ni miskin, maner mampu nak bayor road tax tuk limer-limer buah keter ni ... "

Terkesima si bangau ... begitu ler ader nyer ... the end ...

Di sebuah ladang ternakan ayam... ... kelihatan seekor ayam jantan yang tua duduk termenung... ... masih terngiang-ngiang di telinganya perbualan tuannya untuk membeli ayam jantan yang masih muda... ..apa tidaknya... .di kawasan yang mempunyai 25 ekor ayam betina itu... .hanya dirinya saja yang jantan dan diharapkan untuk memastikan ayam betina yang lain mampu bertelur... ..sedangkan dirinya sudah semakin tua... mana la laratkan... ... ... ...


Suatu hari, seekor ayam jantan muda mula berada disitu. Pasti dibeli oleh tuannya. Si ayam muda begitu angkuh membawa ayam- ayam betina di hadapan ayam jantan tua... .ayam jantan tua hanya mampu memandang dengan menahan marah serta tersenyum sinis saja... ... Dia tahu itu bukannya satu-satu ayam jantan muda yang pernah hadir dikawasan itu... ... namun kerana kepintarannya dia berjaya mengusir semua ayam- ayam jantan yang lain.


Apa kata kau beri aku 10 ekor ayam betina... .kau ambillah lagi 15 ekor..kata ayam tua... ... .mana boleh. Kau tu dahlah tua. Bagi canlah kat aku yang muda ni. Kata ayam jantan muda dengan keangkuhannya yang melampau.


Lantas ayam tua mencadangkan agar satu perlumbaan diadakan dan pemenangnya berhak mendapat semua ayam betina yang ada. Si ayam muda pun bersetuju... ...


Pertandingan yang ditetapkan adalah lumba lari 400m... ... .tetapi ayam tua meminta supaya dia dibenarkan berlari dulu memandangkan dirinya yang sudah tua... ... ayam muda pun bersetuju... ... ... ayam tua mula berlari... ..nun dihujung sana ayam muda mula berlari dan mengejar..semakin hampir..dan tiba- tiba... ... .


DUMMMMMMMM... ... ... tuannya menembak si ayam muda... ..dengan kesal mulutnya membebel... ..AKU TAK TAU KENAPA AYAM JANTAN MUDA YANG AKU BELI NI SUMERNYA GAY... ... TAUNYA KEJAR AYAM JANTAN JUGAK... ... .DAH LA TU... ..NGAN AYAM JANTAN TUA PUN DIA NAK LAYAN !!!!!!!!

... ... ... ... ..ayam tua tersenyum kemenangan dengan penuh kejoboran... ... ... ..

The thermodynamics of Hell

The following is an actual question on a University of Washington mid-term Chemistry paper. One student's answer was so good that the examiner shared it with colleagues via the internet.

Bonus Question:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of the beliefs using Boyle's Law i.e. gas cools off when it expands and heats up when compressed or some variant thereof.

One individual, however, wrote the following...

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing over time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are entering and leaving. I think we can safely assume that once a soul arrives in Hell, it will not be departing. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for the number of souls entering Hell, we must look at the various religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you are damned. Since there are several of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number there to increase exponentially.

Now we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to remain constant, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

a) if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose; or

b) if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls, then the temperature and pressure will fall until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that "... .it'll be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then b) cannot be true. Thus, I am left with and am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

The student received the only A grade given.